What Coaching is Not
For Coaching to be of value, we must understand what it is not.
It is not Mentoring
Unlike mentoring, coaching is not about providing guidance based on the coach’s own experiences and expertise. A mentor imparts their knowledge to help the mentee follow in their footsteps. Coaching does not rely on the coach’s past; it focuses inward to activate the client’s untapped potential.
While a mentor gives directives to aid the mentee’s growth, a coach asks empowering questions to facilitate the client’s self-discovery. Mentoring offers advice; coaching elicits answers from within. A mentor shows the path they took; a coach illuminates the path aligned with the client’s unique gifts and goals. Coaching supports the client’s own solutions, not the coach’s.
It is not Counselling
Counseling and therapy aim to resolve psychological issues and heal past emotional wounds. Coaching looks forward, not backward – it seeks to maximize the present and future. Counseling deals with dysfunction; coaching cultivates untapped strengths.
Counseling focuses on the roots of pain and trauma. Coaching sees the client’s whole and creative potential. Counseling repairs damage; coaching empowers growth. The coaching relationship views the client as resourceful, not as problematic. The goal is realization of potential, not treatment of disorders.
It is not Therapy
Like counseling, therapy aims to overcome past trauma and heal deep emotional wounds. In contrast, coaching is future-focused on pursuing dreams and realizing one’s potential. Therapy resolves pain; coaching empowers purposeful action.
Therapists diagnose and treat dysfunctions in their clients. Coaches nurture the seeds of greatness already within their clients. Therapy analyzes the roots of suffering. Coaching energizes the client’s vision and supports the strategies to achieve it. The coaching relationship sees unlimited possibilities, not limitations.
It is not Training
Training transfers expertise from the trainer to the trainee – a one-way transaction. Coaching is not about teaching expertise; it facilitates two-way self-discovery. Training provides set formulas; coaching activates the client’s inner resources.
A trainer molds the trainee through instruction. A coach elicits the client’s own solutions through inquiry. Training targets narrow learning objectives. Coaching aligns with the client’s broader vision and life purpose. The coaching relationship does not rely on the coach’s knowledge but the client’s inner wisdom.
It is not Consulting
Consultants utilize their subject-matter expertise to diagnose issues and prescribe solutions. Coaching does not rely on the coach’s expertise; it empowers clients to find their own answers from within. Consultants provide recommendations; coaches ask empowering questions.
Consulting brings an outside, objective perspective. Coaching sparks the client’s inner self-insight. Consultants offer best practices based on proven methods. Coaches partner with clients to design customized strategies aligned with their needs and goals. The consulting relationship is directive; coaching is collaborative.
It is not Teaching
Teaching follows a structured curriculum to build intellectual understanding through the transfer of knowledge. In contrast, coaching follows the client’s needs and goals to build self-awareness and purpose.
Teachers share their expertise; coaches draw out the client’s innate strengths. Teaching expands intellectual capacity; coaching cultivates emotional intelligence and vision. Teachers lead from the front; coaches support from alongside. The coaching relationship is a partnership, not teacher-student dynamic.
What Is The Process Like?
Coaching is not like going to a class or attending a seminar, nor is it online learning. It is looking deep inside you, facing your innermost being, coming face to face with the reality of who you are.
Coaching sessions are mind-altering, enlightening, and empowering, however, don’t let anyone tell you it is a walk in the park, it is not, also don’t be deterred by this, it definitely will require effort on your part, but the results, OH! Boy, the results are nothing short of miraculous and just beyond belief.
For you are coming face to face with a masterpiece, one of a kind, never before, never again to ever exist human being, you are discovering you and finally realizing how wonderful, how amazing, and how powerful you are.
1. Let us explore and meet you. Truly, Honestly and Humbly
What do I mean by let us explore and meet you? It is essential for both of us to be very clear as to where we are, and what we are bringing to the table, because if we do not begin with a crystal clear understanding of your mindset, your thought processes, your preconceived notions, and your ideas. It will be impossible to get to where we are going. So we begin with the basics.
2. Objectives and Commitments
Next, we will discuss and become very clear as to what your objectives are from our association, let us understand our roles very clearly, we will document and sign off.
We will also clearly define our commitments to this process, our responsibilities, and obligations so there is no confusion and no 2nd guessing.
3. Time Lines
Let us get our schedules synchronized and agreed upon, so there is no room for any miscommunication. Time is our most precious commodity, it is the only thing in life that is irreplaceable, so we will make sure we are on the same page so as to respect and honor each other’s time.
4. Present Situation
Let us now discuss your present situation, here we are going to be very candid, just as you would not want a doctor to diagnose without having a complete picture, you do want to keep your coach in darkness about anything.
Rest assured all conversations, discussions, and information are absolutely confidential, nothing you disclose will ever be shared or compromised by me.
5. Options and Action Plan
We can now discuss and explore our options, understand what these options mean and how to take advantage.
We will discuss and agree upon a course of action, define milestones and agree to an acceptable outcome.